She’s back, kind of

Being a small business owner is tough. Being a mum in business, who home educates and works around 3 kids aged 4 to 16 is, at times, mind blowingly impossible! I spend my days juggling, though give me an actual set of balls and I’d drop them all in a heartbeat! For all the time I spend planning and organising, when it comes down to it sometimes things just don’t get done. We’ve had dinosaur maths worksheets for about 3 weeks now – 4-year-old not interested. But he has built some amazing wooden machines, been on epic adventures and mastered writing the alphabet. We’ve had phonics worksheets for the same time, the first one has been done but no more. But the 6-year-old has read Disney Princess stories unaided for the first time, she’s made and fixed 1000 different slimes and has taken really good care of our new pet rabbit. And I have a to do list a mile long, mainly practice admin tasks but at least my own accounts are up to date! Sometimes my days run smoothly, productively, everyone is focussed and on the same page. Most days, however, are the opposite! But that’s life and that’s ok. Its ok not to have everything together. If more of us admitted we don’t have everything together perhaps there would be quite the mental health epidemic, particularly amongst mums, that we have now. This is something I have struggled with for a few years and every day takes a conscious effort to be mindful of where my own head is at, my own energy, and to not punish myself when the day doesn’t go as planned and not everything gets done. You can’t be a perfectionist at life, unless of course you have a team behind you doing every little thing – and by team, I mean a nanny, cook, cleaner, personal assistant! The rest of us stand no chance and need to let go of the idea that we can be everything to everyone. Because trying to be everything to everyone only leads to being nothing to no-one when you burn out. Trust me I know first-hand how that feels!

This blog is on my to do list indefinitely and is one thing that always gets “carried forward” but without the red pen. (Red pen carry forward means must get done this week!) I have procrastinated, I have been overwhelmed, I have been underwhelmed, I have been idealess I’ve had too many ideas…and the result is that it has been years since I wrote anything! And I love to write, its soothes my soul, I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was a teenager and its something I know I should nurture. I decided on January 1st, instead of setting new year’s resolutions which I never keep, I would make 2020 the year I do more of what sets my soul alight, I would do things that bring me joy, that raise my vibration and that serves my greater good (though I’m still to determine what that is!) My first decision was to buy a caravan. I have wanted a caravan since I was a girl, my auntie had one and I loved watching them get it ready for a holiday, we even holidayed with them a few times. We briefly had a trailer tent but its not quite the same thing! At a home ed forest school session last summer, talk of caravans came up again with my lovely friend Helen (she writes a fabulous blog find it here – and that really got me thinking about it again. My busiest month of the year, my most profitable month of the year, is January. And an opportunity came knocking that I threw myself into headfirst! So I am now the proud owner of a tourer caravan with a permanent base and I cannot wait for the season to start so that I can spend time in my happy place, the caravan of chill, that I can be inspired by the seasons and get my creative juices flowing again. So, I’m planning on caravan time being blog writing time! I’m even doing a blog writing course to uplevel my skills!

So really this is just a big hello from me, I’m back and will be creating new content over the forthcoming months. So watch this space!

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